Just call me Mr Lonley
by GuppieWithAFlowerCrown
Summary: Remus has always struggled with the concepts of being alone and family. WARNINGS: Angst, possible triggers. Slight Remus/Tonks
1. Just call me Mr Lonley

**Hey guys/gals! Please keep in mind that j wrote this at 1 am on my phone so if it is full of grammatical errors please don't flame me later about it! Disclaimer is at the bottom and I hope that y'all enjoy!**

Ever since the age of 5, Remus Lupin knew that he was destined to be alone. He would watch the children on the playground, chasing each other, playing ball, and sliding down the slides and felt a jealousy that no child should ever feel. These kids had friends and he didn't. They had siblings and he didn't. The had the opportunity to laugh and love a carefree life and little Remus knew that he didn't. Because of the "accident", as his parents called it, he was cursed to a life of loneliness.

He was homeschooled by his mother, a beautiful woman whose face never failed to hold a smile. His father Lyall Lupin, worked in the Ministry of Magic in the Regulation of Magic Creatures Department. Remus didn't know at the time but his mother blamed his father for what had happened to their melancholy son. Her sorrow was tripled everytime that her baby boy gazed out of the window at the other children his age. She tried to keep him busy by encouraging him to read books. Every week she would take him to the library in their quiet little town and let him pick out a single book, usually it was a fantasy book full of tales of magic and sword fights. Her heart broke for the millionth time when he found a book about a young werewolf and excitedly exclaimed, " Look Mummy! He is just like me!" The boy was also overheard by the aging librarian, a nasty gossip who took a particular interest in destroying people's lives.

That was the night that she forced her husband to move them across the _country_ to an even smaller town, far, far away from everyone. In their new house, a small cottage in the woods, Remus felt even more alone than ever before. His mother's smiled faded away until one day Remus couldn't remember the last time that he saw anything but a frown on her face. And so the small family lived in almost complete solitude the years passing by with only the his monthly transformations marking the time.

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Remus Lupin was 11 years and 3 months old when the old man showed up on their doorstep out of the blue. The man was clutching a letter in his hand, a letter that Remus never thought that he would ever see.

Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore was the Headmaster at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He came to the Lupin house in order to assure Mr. &I Mrs. Lupin that their son would have a place at his school if they were agreeable to the idea. At first two adults resisted the ludicrous idea. Both Remus and the Headmaster could see the question on their face. _What kind of crazy old man would let a monster roam around a castle with hundreds of innocent students in harms way?_

Remus himself was in a state of shock. He had always assumed that he would continue to be homeschooled by his mother, and never allowed to learn the art of magic. Eventually his parents came around to the insane idea and agreed to let their son go, but only on the condition that at the first mention of the word "werewolf" outside of the classroom, Remus would be immediately be sent home.

His very first trip to Diagon Alley reassured Remus that the whole thing was indeed real and not just something that he had dreamed up done night. He felt as if he could actually be a normal boy like everybody else and that he could make friends. This idea was crushed the night before he left by his father who made sure to tell Remus that, "You must be careful,a single word by a 'friend' can turn your life upside down in a matter of seconds. Trust nobody except for yourself because they will most likely let you down and leave you behind . Take extra precautions around the full moon and never, _never_ tell anybody what you really are."

On the Hogwarts Express, Remus never said a single word to anybody in his compartment. Ignoring the two silly boys, the fiery redhead, her greasy companion, and the chubby boy he moodily stared out of the window until, at last, they reached his new home. Even though the was surrounded by hundreds of people, Remus never felt more alone than at that exact moment.

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When Remus Lupin was 21 he knew that his father had been right all those years ago. His best friend and her husband, his brother, had left him behind to grieve and Peter followed the couple a few days later. Sirius Black, a man he used to also call brother, had killed them along with Remus' happiness. His mother and father died as well almost exactly a year after James and Lily. The only comfort he had was Harry, his nephew, and he too was soon was ripped from Remus, leaving the wolf truly alone.

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When Remus was 35 he was reacquainted with his cub, Harry. Harry could no longer be called a cub though, a very tough life had forced the boy to grow up faster than he should have leaving him wise beyond his years. Remus felt as though Harry could somehow see right through him, a trait that reminded him of Lily. The wolf felt a great urge to protect Harry from his former-brother, going as far as to stalk him using the Marauders Map, a wonderful little invention that he and his friends had cooked up their 5th year at Hogwarts. When he saw that not only was a dead man alive, but he was in the same area as Sirius, he quickly ran to their location, leaving his steaming goblet on the table in front of him.

The events that night only reaffirmed his belief that he was a dangerous man, no not a man, a dangerous creature, and he immediately quit his job the following morning. And even though Remus had his brother back, a part of Sirius had died that night along with Janes and Lily, leaving behind a half-empty shell of what he used to be. The convict turned to alcohol to deal with the events of his life, and when Nymphadora Tonks showed up at an Order meeting he felt something strange, old, and familiar rise up in his chest. Remus was no longer alone in the world.

ToThen everything changed when the Death Eaters attacked the children in the hall of prophecies.

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To Old. To Dangerous. To Poor.

He listed those reasons everyday to Dora. But what he didn't add was that he was also destined to be alone forever.

To Old. To Dangerous. To Poor.

He didn't know how fate would take her away from him and he knew that he couldn't survive loosing her.

To Old. To Dangerous. To Poor.

It wasn't t until she was almost crushed on an Auror mission that he realized that it didn't matter anyway. He knew that she was his missing half. She was the color in his otherwise dreary life. He lived for her, and she for him. He soon stopped repeating his reasons and eventually gave in and married her.

It wasn't until he learned that she was pregnant that all those reasons rushed back to him at once.

To Old. To Dangerous. To Poor.

Harry turned him away and once again he was alone.

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Remus awoke to a brilliant light and the sound of a voice he would never forget. The battle still raged in his mind, colors blending together forming a mirage of deadly rainbows. He immediately squeezed tighter on his wand only to find that it was not in his hand. Instead he could feel the warmth of another humans hand there. A flash of red crossed his vision and suddenly he knew where he was.

He knew that only a single person could have that exact shade of red, and the voice was so full of affection that he knew exactly who was talking to him.

"Lily," he managed to gasp out. "James?"

"shhhhh," a second voice soothes him. "Its alright son, you and your Dora are safe now."

"Mum," he cried launching himself towards her, "Mum where's Teddy? Where's my little boy?"

She shushed him once again before brushing his hair back, just as she did when he was a child.

"He is safe. Harry, Ginny and Andromeda are with him. They will take care of him."

Remus could feel Dora stirring next to him and he braced himself for what he knew her reaction would be.

"Teddy?" She whispered quietly. Like Remus, she had figured out where she was in a matter of seconds. He felt comforting arms come around the two of them, pulling them into motherly embrace.

"We know exactly what you are going through," Lily told the grieving couple, "He will be fine. I promise you that he will be fine until it is time for him to come here, until then though, there are a few people who have been waiting for the two of you for a long time."

Lily pulled away from them and walked with Remus' mother to a group that was directly in front of them. It was their entire family; James and Lily, Sirius, his mother and his father, Dora's father, and there in the background was an old man with a twinkle in his eye. Remus finally was with his family and he would never be alone ever again.

 **AN: Harry Potter does not belong to me**

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 **-WitchBurnes**


	2. poll

Hey guys! I know that it's been a while since I last posted anything on the site. This is because I have lost my muse and have no ambition to write currently. This is where y'all come in though. I want every single person who has ever read one of my stories to enter this poll. You get to pick which one of my stories that I will re-write in an attempt to reconnect with my muse. It doesn't matter if the story is completed, in-progress, or basically abandoned, I will re-write that sucker so that it is even better than it was before. You have until Friday, September 22, 2017, to submit your choice. Please vote!


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